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4.25.2004
St. Mathew's Post Office Box Church Kilgore Trout (Yes, that Kilgore Trout!) over at CNR recently shared his experience with a holy artifact. The most hawly Prayer Rug was sent to him by St. Mathew's Church right here in Tulsa, Oklahoma! See the rug. Its a beaut, definitely a standout in the "rugs with big faces" category. Sadly, I found out later that St. Mathews is not really a church here in Tulsa, unless you broaden the definition of church to include P.O. Boxes. This mail order operation is actually run out of a mansion in Los Angeles. Though Ewing claims it is a church, Saint Matthew's Churches, once called St. Matthew Publishing Inc., has no address other than a Tulsa post office box. It has two listed phone numbers in Tulsa and both are answered by a recorded religious message. I was devastated to say the least. I was all dressed up and ready for a service this morning. I assumed that they would have "loaner" prayer rugs for first timers, with a deposit in case you forgot to return it, or got it muddy. But no. Its not here. In its application for tax-exempt status, Church by Mail stated that 'it conducts regular worship services, usually without the congregation physically present.' How many angels can dance in a P.O. Box? So its a scam. Why do random mailings asking for money always turn out that way? Not only is it a scam, its quite a lucrative one. Ewing, the man who runs the thing siphons off money by hiring his own for-profit advertising firm to do work for the non-profit mailing service. He receives a salary from each. He has make his career out of setting up similar operations for the likes of Oral Roberts and Robert Tilton, both paragons of virtue. You remember that Oral once claimed that God would take him if people didn't send in $8 million by March 31, 1987? St. Mathews has a very familiar strategy, hitting up the poor and desperate. A memo from McElrath (a partner in crime) to their lawyer: 'Using this new method of selection we are actually picking those geographic areas that we know respond the best to our growth letters. The size of each special area is about two to four city blocks. And thank God there are 10's of thousands of them across the nation.' What's this say about KT's neighborhood, a "special area"? I dunno. I once spent a day in Denver, it seemed like a nice, if expensive place to live. To learn more about St. Mathews you should read this article written by George Loper whose favorite author is.... Kurt Vonnegut. The circle of irony is complete. | |
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