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9.22.2004
Today I ran over an apple with my car. How many people can say that? I was drinving along and there it was, in the road, half chewed, whites of its insides showing. Before I realized what I was doing, my right front tire hits the apple sqaure on with a noise inaudible beneath the sound of my blaring stereo. I looked in the rearview mirror to see the chunks scattered about the road. I'm sure that by now the apple guts have been ejected from the treads of my tires. "The future butterfly, gonna spend the day, higher than high" - Elliott Smith I'm exiting Quiktrip. I had carefully surveyed which exit to take. I would be turning right into the street with easy access to the left turn lane due to a light to the left. But. There in front of me sits a Chevrolet Blazer with Shriner stickers wanting to turn left. This doesn't happen because of the aforementioned light to the left. So cars sit in the opposing lane, blocking the Shriner Blazer from turning left but allowing what would have been a perfectly timed right hand turn by myself. Making matters worse is the fact that Shriner Blazer is too far to the right to allow me to slip past. This, despite copious room to inhabit the middle of the turn area. AAARRRGHHH... am I the only one anal enough to always pick the best exit before attempting to leave a corner gas station? I think I am. Evidence seems to bear me out. So, lady with big-ass Toyota SUV cuts across two lanes with no signal causing me to stop prematurely. I look her rearview mirror to see her yakking away on her cellphone. At rush hour, everyone is one a cellphone. I think it should be legal to ram into some big-ass Toyota SUV if you see that person on a cellphone. SMACK!! "Well, you see officer, she was on a cellphone, didn't signal, so I figured 'What the Fuck, why not?'" "Sure, if she doesn't have the courtesy to get off her fucking cellphone you have every right to ram your piece of shit late madel car into her pricey SUV. Have a nice day sir." Murphy's Stout, The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay (still) and no cute waiteresses. Oh well. Is it just me or is it taking forever for Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind to come out on DVD? September 28th? And in the meantime we get KD doing Wimbledon? ouch. |
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